Separation Anxiety: The First Day of School

     The first day of school is a big step for every child, especially since they are used to being in their parents’ company almost every day of their lives.  Separation anxiety is a normal reaction by a child when they realize that for the first time, mom and dad won’t be around them for an extended period of time.  To help ease your child’s concerns about this transition, here are some suggestions that will help your child outgrow, or possibly avoid, separation anxiety.

Prepare Before School Begins

• Choose a school where you are completely comfortable with the program, teachers and location. Your child will feel more comfortable at a school you are comfortable leaving him at.
• Introduce your child to the teacher before school starts so they have time to get to know each other.
• Walk you child around the school, pointing out areas like his classroom, playground, and bathrooms.
• Talk to your child about what it is like going to school. Give her an idea of what a typical day will be like. Tell her stories about some positive memories you have of going to school.
• Have your child help prepare for the first day. Ask him what clothes he wants to wear. Have him pick out which backpack and supplies he wants.
• Reassure her that she will have a great time at school with all the fun activities she will be doing.
• If possible, introduce him to other students that are going to be in the same class so he can make friends before the first day.

The First Day

• Reintroduce the teacher to your child so they can continue building their relationship. Make sure your child knows that you trust the teacher to watch over them while you are not there.
• Give your child a picture of you that she can keep in her pocket so she can pull it out and see you if she wants.
• Allow your child to bring one of their toys with him to make him feel safe (ask the teacher ahead of time if this is all right).
• If your child starts to cry when it’s time for you to leave, don’t worry. Most children stop crying minutes after you leave.
• Make sure your child sees how comfortable you are leaving her at school. Sometimes, the less you worry, the less she will.
• Reward your child when he gets through the day/week well with a small gift.
• Introduce your child to some of the other students while you are there so she can make friends and feel more comfortable.
• If there is a sibling at the same school, ask him to check in on your little one when they have free time during the day.
• Make sure you are at school on time to pick your child up. This will reinforce her comfort knowing that you are waiting for her when she gets out.
• Set time aside to discuss the day with your child at home. Congratulate him on everything he did at school and let him know how proud you are.

Anthony Ripo
Mommy & Me Correspondent