Grief and Coping Resources

Grief and Coping Resources

Every person deals with grief in their own unique way.  And it is important during these times to know that you do not stand alone.  Though your loss is personal and unique, the knowledge that others have lived through and survived a similar situation can be of some consolation in your journey. 

It Takes Time

Though times for grieving vary, it has been observed that a state of partial incapacitation due to grief can last from one to three years for the loss of a child, and nine to fifteen months when a miscarriage occurs.  Both of these are a long time to survive alone, and even with family members involved, we all have our own personal needs when learning to cope.  Getting help from the outside world is, sooner or later, essential.

Here are some options for finding help and comfort while trying to cope with this terrible situation.

• Grief counseling groups. Your hospital or physician can guide you to parent groups in your area
• Support offered by your religious organization. Most churches, synagogues, temples, and other religious communities offer guidance and counseling that is belief oriented, which can be extremely comforting to believers
• Internet sites. There are blogs, chat rooms, and even memorial groups that you can join to share your story, and hear the stories of others.
• Create a memorial. Taking action to remember your child or pregnancy in a positive way, to help appreciate the good that was brought into you life with theirs.  Photo collages, stepping stones for your garden…keep the best things about them close to your heart.
•  Reach out to others. Joining groups like the Angel Teddy Bears Foundation – a group that delivers teddy bears to hospitals who then give them to grieving parents – or other groups, gives other parents immediate evidence that others do understand and care.
• Professional Counseling. Sometimes, the ear of an uninvolved outsider is what’s needed.  Someone who can relate matter-of-factly just how usual your reactions are, when seen in the perspective of humanity, and help you through the stages of grief.

Availing yourself of any, or all, of the above options, will keep you pro-active, and moving towards a new understanding of your new life.  One that those who are gone might just wish you to enjoy and live to the fullest.  Our hearts go out to you.